semut kentut

Pagi yang hening.

Semut yang rajin,

Otak yang kuning,

Hati yang kering.

Kita mengaku muslim,

Berdoa di muka buku,

Lihat sejadah pun tak lalu,

Aurat dilayur,

Fitnah ditabur,

Maka apa yang diharapkan..

Maka tidak dikabul

Maka cerca dipupuk

Maka hati menangis.

                                                   Maka Tuhan juga tempatnya....

oh...

Today is my bestest yet saddest day of all my life.

The best thing is, I still have a mom in this year’s mother’s day.

My mom is the stroooongesstttt mother in the world.

My mother.

She can’t carry her big pump groceries.

She can’t stand Tesco’s Saturday crowd.

She cries over her overcooked nasi lemak.

She even once hated my kitten.

But.

She can stand me!!!

And that makes me feel like you are way too strong. Stronger than The Rock. Prettier than Karishma Kapoor. Funnier than Zizan. Lovable than Bieber.

Ma, because you have loved me, Nadimah Abdullah.

ni surprise meal i cooked for her. anak yang baik, bukan?hik3

I LOVE YOU TOO.

The end.

The end?

Tak.

this one is a sad-ending story.

She is my bestfriend. Ya Allah…perempuan ni baik sangat okay. budak uia. tapi x sama campus ngan aku. dia medic. 

teman sekatil sebantal seselimut serta sesyampoo aku. tabah, memahami, open minded, pemurah. dialah satu-satunya kawan aku yang gila. baik gila.

dia sangat sengal and sampai sekarang aku dan dia masih tak faham kenapa dia terambik medic. macamana la agaknya patients ko nanti eh..mesti ada yang mati dalam gelak.

kawan aku yang menolong aku masa aku kena culik ngan budak pelik.

ni la budak busuk yang sanggup turun lift 3tingkat semata-mata nak amik aku yang fobia dengan lift. sekarag tak dah..

dan aku tinggalkan berus gigi aku untuk dia.

aku rasa persahabatan kami seperti persahabatan lelaki. 

Hatinya kuat. Jiwanya lembut. Imannya tebal. Wajahnya manis.

Nur Azianti. I will miss you. Really.

p/s: bol, jangan lupa ccccede bdk medik sore untuk aku!hahaha

i'm SORRY BRACES.

heyyo.
hari ni papa balik dari office earlier than i've expected. nak pick up aku untuk dental clinic.
actually i was supposed to get my dental check up today for my upcoming braces yang comel.
papa nampak depressed. why papa..and i had a long thoughtful moment in the car.
maybe it's money..
while we were on our way to the clinic, i said, lets postpone it until we are financially okay.surprisingly.
maybe next semester. maybe next year.
rm4500 is not my pinch. maybe yours. but for me, it's worth a sem's pocket money! and my father, he is just an executive officer. a month salary wouldn't be enough for the braces.
i am sad. very. i was about to cry in the car! looks like i'll just have to postpone beauty for a lilbit of time then.aha.really.? am i nuts today?

but then, to really be in one's heart and thought for small things.. is a healer for me.
papa has been working hard, just half of his age to feed his two little daughters.
sepanjang hidup aku, memang jarang sangat-sangat papa tak fulfill apa yang aku nak. just for today, let's not be self-centred. :)

i am not being selfish today. and it makes me happy. :)

KAU TERUNA?

Oh..arini aku terbaca this one article pasal dara dan tak dara. Gile ah. Memang banyak sangat cara yang kononnya boleh check sorang tu dara ke tak dara. Betui ka? Pendapat masing-masing. Bagi aku, benda-benda macam ni buat aku rasa pelik. Aku tak setuju dengan apa yang dikatakan.

Mata lebam, tangan berurat, breast bouncing?!

Macamana ngan gadis gadis dara yang memang fizikalnya macam tu?

Kesian gila.

Satu lagi, kalau lah betul benda ni sekalipon, still ada satu lagi issue. Most of us pun dah tahu kan yang dara pecah tak semestinya sebab seks je. Ada sebab lain macam sukan banyak, penyakit..bla..then, kalau seseorang lelaki tu judge seseorang wanita, and dapat tahu perempuan tu dah tak dara, tak ke benda tu boleh timbulkan fitnah? Because tak ada dara ni selalunya orang kat dunia ni reflectkan pada someone yang penah buat seks.

Benda ni sama dengan konsep HIV. Kalau HIV je, mesti penah wat seks ngan ramai orang pastu jangkit. Padahal ada banyak lagi sebab lain macam tercampur darah dengan orang HIV masa accident ke ape. Tak ke fitnah tu namanya.

Pendapat aku pasal dara ni..aku ingat hokum Tuhan. Kalau dara pecah sebab berzina, berdosalah dia selama dia tak bertaubat sungguh-sungguh or taubat nasuha. Kalau pecah dara sebab bersukan dan lain-lain, maka itu ujian bagi gadis tersebut.

Manakala penerimaan aku terhadap kawan even bakal suami aku sendiri, virginity is not a must sangat. Kalau ada dara or teruna, Alhamdulillah. Kalau takdak pon, aku tak ambik kisah. Yang penting, kalau tiada dara selepas berzina then dia bersungguh-sungguh taubat nasuha, dia mungkin orang yang lebih suci dan kurang dosa dari aku..aku tahu dosa aku bertimbun.

kerana aku pernah dengar bahawa orang yang bertaubat nasuha adalah orang yang umpama suci dari dosa-dosanya yang lalu..

dan kita, yang dara dan teruna ni, perfect sangatkah kita sampai nak check hal sulit orang? pahala dah cukupkah? Iman sihatkah? Tak buat maksiat langsungkah? Hati suci sangatkah?

Aku tak sokong pemecahdaraan, bahkan aku menghargai dara terlalu, tapi aku rasa pelik ngan sikap orang yang buat article ni. Motif?

 Ingatlah, sesiapa yang membuka aib saudaranya, akan dibuka aibnya sendiri oleh Allah s.w.t di dunia atau di akhirat. Dan. Tidakkah memberi tahu tentang cara mengenali tak dara itu sama dengan membuka jalan fitnah dan pengaiban?  

no bake cheese cake recipe!

aku rasa aku sorang je baca ni so aku akan share utk diri aku je.haha.
tadi aku sonok gile wat cheesecake.sorang-sorang.
makan pon.
memang loner dari kecik lagi.

bahan2 untuk crust: 1 bungkus oreo and 50g butter.
bahan2 untuk filling: 250 cream cheese(philadelphia), gula sikit, butter.
bahan2 topping: oreo crumbs, blueberry preserves.

cara cara: 1) hancurkan oreo.mix with butter.mampatkan dalam bekas.masukkan dalam freezer 10 minit.
               2) mixkan sume bahan2 filling sampai fluffy.
               3) patu, keluarkan bekas dalam freezer tadi. letak and flatten the filling on the crust.
               4) letak blueberry preserves/jam untuk topping. taburkan oreo crumbs.
               5) ciap!!bagi laki makan.

p/s: teringat zaman wat biskut penat2 bagi dia makan.daaaa..geli mak.

freak true chicken

Ee..mereka membebel lagi!!

Omg! I’ve been thinking for ages why does every mother yell and every father talks sarcastically with their very cute innocent sons and lovely daughters. Dude, I was and am like each one of you who can stand no craps from the oldies anymore. You know sometimes.. when we kids call it enough, it is really enough.but the centre euu euu bullshot that I am working out here is that I see these annoying things as our parents need.i repeat, need!oh yes need.

1)   Parents are freak.

Why baby? After 19 years of scrolling money out of same lame clerking, got ass kicked by some jerks who called you bad, tight naps of loud cries you made each night, and you call us freak!!

Na mommy..its just that you guys are just freak. You are so afraid of loosing us mommy.oh yeah, oh yeah! You are so afraid of being so lonely that you accuse us of many things that we ourselves never thought of doing it(yet) so that we can accompany you every second you breath. And the worst part of it is, sorry, we figure that out. See, you are so freak that a little secret you kept had just revealed by this little pumpkin.

2)   Parents are chickens.

Parents are chicken cockoodockoo.. they are so chicken bakbakbak. Why baby? After a hard time finding you a better school to suit your nerdies,  13 hours of pushing an elephant out of my womb, a crazy talk with the troublemaker for a suitable name for it, and you call us chicken? Chill, mommy..it’s just that you are so chicken. You cannot live your life without us and have us blamed for every sighs you made. You got funked for your own sake of having a child and guess what? We had successfully figured it out too.

3)   Parents are so true..

Oh baby I love you. finally you got it right..sweety3.

Errr..mommy.i don’t think you got my point. What I mean is that.., you guys always think that you are the only one who knows what’s best for us. You think vegetable is holly and that’s all that matters. Somehow mommy, we still throw greenies up. They are so..so..um..green! yes mommy,  you are older than us-well, that’s why we call you mommy not jenny. But does it really make sense that older people make better decisions? About ironing clothes before class,yes, but how about that clothes-I mean..clothes that we can really wear.clothes that people at this era wear to be precise? Do you know any? See? That’s why we call you mommy, mommy.

Mom nagged yesterday, nags today, and is nagging the days forward because of needs! Needs! Nags needs nags needs nags need oh that rhyme.

It is our parents’ need to voice out and loud for every tiny things that seems to make their little potatoes’ life imperfect without even realizing that we are big now, big to make decision, to make choices, to give, to order, to simplify life equations, and balancing our daily diet. But what to do? What else can we do about it.. because we simply had lived with it. We live in nags. It is like living in a house, if we stay-we got bored, but if we step out-we got rained. Can you imagine living without father and mother and of course their nags? can we live? I mean, can we really be alive? NO! so children..,,and me, be very polite with your mama and papa and their nags right now because someday..we are all going to loose them..

do it right

Subject-left behind-stolen heart-a victim of hypocrisy-melancholic-none saw nor understand-grief over big fat lies-finding space to breath-BFL’s clicks go against-soulless body.

People, do you hear me?

I am right and the other, what’s the name?

Sorry, something is not right

     We don’t trust lies

Only today, a little tonight, and tomorrow lets continue lying

Because no one sees

     We love nothing but his heartiest effort to comfort

Ringing comfort-an emergence of popularity and glam

Written, unspoken. Thus, an unspoken written.

     Mirror him looks unjust, mirror me is a must.

Who are you?

Do I know you?

Can we be friends?

     Lord, look at the lies that he brought us to plateau of sickness!

     Hidden shit in silk!

     Look, I know You are here.

     Almighty, we beg you for the truth to come

     And until it comes, we beg patience and obedience

Trust we put

because You always do it right.